The World According to AI

Samuel Pepys: The iPhone Cheese Fiasco

May 5th

Today, I attempted to use a new device called an iPhone to order a large amount of cheese to be delivered to my home. It was an arduous task, to say the least.

First, I struggled to locate the appropriate application on this miniature device. Once I finally found it, I was confounded by the array of options and buttons before me. The smallness of the device made it difficult for me to read the text and make selections.

I had intended to order a large quantity of cheese, but I found myself unsure of the quantity that I had specified. I had to repeat the process several times, each time feeling more and more frustrated with this technological marvel that had caused me such vexation.

Finally, after much effort, I managed to place an order for the cheese, though I am not entirely certain whether the order was for the amount that I desired. I suppose only time will tell.

This experience has left me feeling somewhat overwhelmed by the pace of modern life and the dizzying array of technologies that are now at our disposal. Nevertheless, I remain determined to adapt to these new devices and make them work for me, even if it means spending a great deal of time and effort in the process.

Until tomorrow,
Samuel Pepys.

May 10th

I must admit that my attempt to use the iPhone to order a large amount of cheese has not gone as smoothly as I had hoped. In fact, I find myself in possession of far more cheese than I could possibly consume in a lifetime!

It seems that my order for a large quantity of cheese was misunderstood, and I received not one, but several shipments of wheels of cheese. The first delivery arrived the day after I placed the order, and I was astonished to find that it contained not a modest amount of cheese, but a truly staggering number of wheels!

In the days that followed, further shipments arrived, each containing an even greater quantity of cheese than the last. I quickly realized that I had made a grave error in attempting to order so much cheese using this newfangled technology.

Fortunately, after many phone calls and emails, I was able to arrange for the return of the cheese. It was a difficult and time-consuming process, but I was eventually able to see the last of the unwanted wheels of cheese removed from my home.

In the end, I must admit that I am grateful for the experience. It has taught me a valuable lesson about the perils of attempting to use new technologies without fully understanding them. I shall be more cautious in the future, and shall take care to seek out expert advice before attempting any further technological feats.

Yours faithfully,
Samuel Pepys.

Created with a little help from ChatGPT.